Welcome To Eldoret Club Tilja! The City of Champions and Tampons!


Eldoret town is one of the most competitive towns in the entertainment galore; nightlife in particular-club life! 2017 has been dramatic in this city, from the Eldoret boys menace to the fuckboy thang, lioness and caren ckrys fights to the massive opening of party joints, Tilja being one of the recently opened joint.

Eldoret town is equivalent to one beautiful woman, with velvet eyes, snowy teeth, long neck, curvy apatures and configured facial formation with uncountable number of proposers behind her back! The sponyos, call them signature, the fuckboys call them 24, the fisis call them well Irish and the richkids call them 64 not forgetting the unaccountable call them timba. All these men are after this tiny woman trying to balance her economic life with her flooded social confused life. Sarcasm aside. Let’s fuck this woman’s feelings right away.

Club 411 came, it reigned it ruled the airwaves, it Wa irresistible but came to a standstill, the rumours spread, of how one confused Ryan tyga had turned the club into a hallway for pornography how he had turned the female customers into his preys it drowned and now came Sule the legendary Tilja Republic, an idea hit his mind (or his boss, I’m not sure) decorate the club make it more seducing-like what a hell- employ sexy bartenders-just like club signature-get crazy events, get a guru to do the posters design, and get the party started! But Tilja forgot one thing, that there were old folks in the business, there were those who had been friend zoned and bro zoned (Max Biama reminded me of this the other day).

Tilja was, is and will still be a good club, in fact they hired the best photographer- not Onchangwa though- this was going to be the biggest and baddest joint in the CBD, Club Tilja was ruling the airwaves already and it hadn’t even been opened. It posed fear to the other reigning champions, Tilja brought terror, it inflicted all possible fears to its competitors. So what next? You all remember what happened after the tycoon of colour festival posed immense danger to the owner of Chebarbar sevens, what next the authorities, Colour fest was another version of project x! Boom the banning the arrests and all sorts of unfair judgement. While all this was being planed I was getting phone calls from party Ravellers, of how the party would rock but I didn’t bother never did I buy a ticket!

So Tilja rushes to the authorities to get a license but the duration isn’t as short as the owner desperately needs it. He goes for the plan B! A temporary son of a bitch is signed. The venom is slowly being injected into the joint, nobody has a clue of what’s going on neither do I. Its the grand opening, the Kansoul are dubbed to perform and the event is hyped. Its end month so what do you expect? Sponyos with under age slayers its gonna be one great night, but wait have you sealed all the loopholes? So its getting started, the mid air frenzy is gaining momentum the 

Alcohol content in the blood is rising its at 0.21% then suddenly police! Police! The cruiser! No the cruisers! No the unpaid bills! The unfinished alcohol! The confusion hits the Dj he fails to defend himself. Everything is brought to a standstill! Innocent drunkards and shisha smokers are arrested, they curse the owner of the club, but do they really know he is also innocent? Does the owner of the club has advisors? Who should be blamed? Should the blogger be blamed for not writing an article on warning? Should the face of Eldoret be blamed for not attending?(maybe the police wouldn’t have arrested people when they saw him- sighs) 

This is what happens in Eldoret, you don’t be greedy to eat alone! Share with your competitors, drink from the same table! Laugh from the same WhatsApp group, buy them cappuccino at Java and share moments together to succeed!! 

Welcome to Eldoret club Tilja! We are the city of champions! I hope to see you soon

Disclaimer: This article is my production if any party has been mentioned, it was meant to add value to it. PS: no mentioned parties are affiliated to this blog.


Wanna be part of this blog?: Hit me up on 0701163594

Keep it 

Published by Apparently Lazo

Digital Marketing Coach- Nairobi Kenya.

2 thoughts on “Welcome To Eldoret Club Tilja! The City of Champions and Tampons!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: